Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
