Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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