I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
The beer is more important than you right now.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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