she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
