that's an acceptable place to lick
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
