Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
