who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
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