She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
