He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
