scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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