I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
