I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
