my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
