If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
