I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize