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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually

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• (315): View more from New York

  She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.

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• (518): View more from New York

  The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.

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• (571): View more from Virginia

  you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.

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• (818): View more from California

  I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent

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