Don't make out with my wife yet
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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