Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
