But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
