I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
