I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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