trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
