i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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