elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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