This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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