i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize