'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
