In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I think im going to throw up on grandma
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Randomize
