He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I've got a whole match.com system. Triple book. First dates always get the 6pm happy hour drinks slot. 8pm dinner goes to a girl where I think I can close the deal. 10pm slot goes to the sure thing in case of emergency, but 6 can always trump 8 and 8 always trumps 10. Just blame it on a dead iPhone battery.
That, my friend, is how I bang 50 new girls a year. Not luck at all. It's science and statistics.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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