it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
