How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
