Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Randomize
