my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
