i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
