I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
