he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize