What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
the room spins SO much faster in panama
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
