I feel like abortions should bother me more
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
