i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
