Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
