shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
