only if we run a train.
done.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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