Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
