I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
