perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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