before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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