Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
