I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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