just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
