We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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