I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
