so let's talk penis.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
You don't make any sense
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